A Factless Autobiography is inspired by a chapter of the same name in the Book of Disquiet by the Portuguese poet Fernando Pessoa. It is an intimate and personal exploration of loss, desire, and the fragile nature of our existence. I started this project in response to the death of a lover and my confrontation with tuberculosis as a young adult. It grapples with the complex and often conflicting emotions of grief, melancholia, and survival while also questioning the nature of gender, identity, and the human condition. This work is a fragmented narrative of lived experience, longing, and healing.

A Factless Autobiography marks the first chapter of an ongoing trilogy that I have been working on for seven years, spanning my time in the U.S., This series primarily focuses on the journeys of three protagonists: a trans woman from Côte d'Ivoire, an immigrant in America and recovering addict whom I met in my early years in the U.S.; a Black gay American man, a survivor of abuse, and myself. Our personal and collective histories and struggles offer a window into the often-overlooked complexities of identity in a fractured society. Through this work, I try to explore the challenges of being a queer South Asian immigrant in the socially and politically fragmented landscape of America, where queer and trans lives are increasingly at risk while also attempting to raise awareness of the power of solidarity and community.

Central to my process is cultivating meaningful connections with those I meet. Through sustained conversations and the development of friendships with strangers—many of whom are survivors of trauma—I aim to create a healing space in which they can express their pain and their hopes for transformation. By invoking a sense of anonymity and ambiguity, I honor the subject’s presence as both a collaborator and a performer in the work, allowing for a layered narrative. Through these intimate and intense encounters, I seek to expand the often-neglected conversations surrounding taboo issues, such as mental health, suicide, trauma related to trans and queer experiences, and human feelings of desire and longing.

Through a collaborative choreography, in which dreams sometimes color reality, I ultimately raise the question of self-affirmation.