For the past five years I’ve been working exclusively with analog B&W photography in several formats – 35mm, 120, and 4x5. The work encompasses my time processing grief over failing to start a family with my wife, Amira, both naturally and via IVF; as well as the recent adoption of our daughter Ruth. I approach my practice in two different ways:

- Documentary and environmental portraiture work, where I try to capture the day to day of raising an infant in NYC. I make self-portraits with my daughter, as well as city street life, and various nature trips when the city becomes too much.

- Conceptual photography, where I am trying to work through memories of infertility, starting a family, and my own sense of self and belonging. This has included photographing re-enactments of past traumatic memories.

Wrangling these two approaches into one body of work is essentially the work for me. My artistic practice is the act of trying to understand these two very different parts of myself – the real and the fantastical. Starting a family amidst IVF injections, interstate adoption bureaucracy, and dirty diapers is all an excellent education in juggling seemingly incongruous ideas.

Something I’ve discovered over the past five years taking pictures, has been the solace found in the woods and on the beach. As someone who has always been a bit uncomfortable around people, I find nature indifferent – that is what drives me there. Its’ indifference feels like a weighted blanket.

Through the images I’m working on, I will bring viewers into our apartment, but also into the woods and water. I intend to pair my prints with short pieces of writing that I’m working on concurrently, often in the darkroom. Together, I hope to reveal to myself what the binding of joy and grief looks like.

B&W film and prints, intended for printing at 11x14